Waves Or Particles?

Frank woke up …he was at the beach.

Who was he this time? He seemed to

remember… Franklin Tish…yes, that

was his name. He felt better…the fog

of sleep was beginning to recede like

the tide. He knew it would be back…

no one stays awake forever…or, do 

they? What about the enlightened ones

whose bodies evanesce when they die?

He knew he’d read about them. He 

knew he had some connection. Perhaps

things would become clearer over the

course of the day. That’s what usually

happened. He trusted the process…it

took a long time for faith to develop,

but eventually it did.

It was fresh from the rain last night.

Rainy season had begun, and the heat

of the last few weeks was beginning

to assuage. He got out of bed and

went over and looked out the window

of the room he had rented over the 

restaurant. No people on the beach.

A few clouds punctuated the horizon.

He remembered he used to have a 

schedule, a routine, even a purpose,

but no more. Every morning he woke

up, there was that second, that moment,

before he was awake, a slight panic, 

then, a letting go when he realized he

no longer was a plumber, no longer had

to go to the job. Rather amazing how

patterns linger. The mind is a terrible thing.

He got back into bed. The sun wasn’t fully 

up yet. He had plenty of time, which was

rather a surprise. Maybe he’d fall asleep 

for a while. Maybe he’d have another dream.

The last part of the night, the last part of

a good night’s sleep is when the dreams

usually came. He wondered what the 

message would be this time? He hoped

it wasn’t that he was back in college for

another year. That dream was always a

nightmare.

Anyone that loves a beach would love

Mazunte. It was off season, so there were

few people there, which was nice. The people

he did meet were splendid…easier to be that

way in pleasant surroundings. There was no

reason to complain, so complaints didn’t 

seem to arise…at least, not as much as in

Pittsburg.

Why did Pittsburg just pop into his mind 

just then? Why did anything? He’d only been

on the outskirts of Pittsburgh once in his life,

when he hitchhiked East with a black girl in 

‘69. Is that true? Did he do that? He did seem

to have the memory.

Some of his memories were scary…times when

he averted an accident at work or driving a car.

He sometimes wondered how he survived…there

was always a slight twinge when he had those

memories…a residue of fear, like sand in your 

shoe. His mechanism, his Deus ex Machina, held

a lot of secrets. Maybe there was still time to 

figure out how to work this thing, this body/mind,

this soul fastened to a dying animal, but he wasn’t 

hopeful. Luckily, he wasn’t much fearful either, as

he had been when he was young. He was very

aware of death when he was young. It drove him

to try and find out what it meant to be alive at all,

in the first place. He’d made leaps in that 

direction. Now that he knew he had eternity to

fully realize the answer, he was more relaxed, in

general. Eternity? Just watch the waves endlessly

breaking on the beach. The waves come from 

the ocean. Thoughts come from mind.