Great Things About Getting Old (For Carol)

You can't remember if you have
any regrets.

"Curmudgeon Cudgel"
...everyone expects you to hate everything.

...good excuse for
incontinence and
incoherence

...people are more likely to help,
because they don't want to see you
die in front of them.

...you don't have to move much
to have a good time.

...you can look at women,
and they're not offended.

...women look at you,
and you're not aroused.