Friday, January 16, 2009

Rough Translation of Itself

I can't watch the movie becauseĀ 
your violin is too big...couldĀ 
you satisfy me please?

Thank you for participating
in our emergency life drill.
If it had been an actual life, you
would have been given instructions.

It is forbidden to believe anything
on these premises.

"Anyone for Gulag?"

The misuses of bells and
whistles is strictly prohibited.

If you are about to go into the pool,
check to see if you have washed first.
Check your friends to see if they
have washed.

When rushing too fast around the pool,
observe the life of others.

The presence of glass containers around
the pool is quite amazing. Please exchange
these for better utensil. Life is in your feet.

These rules are meant to be obeyed
for your kindness. Any missteps involve
severe lashings.

I'm glad we're done here.
(Lit.: "I'm Vlad. We're done here.")

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